Thursday, July 30, 2009

Brittny - 30 July 2009

I'm going to break with my current trend and actually post my high and low in the prescribed order, since I think it will work better that way.

Background - As you all know, Eric and I have had a very special conundrum placed before us. On Wednesday, July 21 - the day before our due diligence deadline (the last day to cancel the offer we had placed on our house without losing our earnest money) - Eric was informed of an opportunity which would take us to China. Of course, this meant that we had to scramble to get information about this opportunity and others which we had and reconsider whether or not we were buying the house we had placed an offer on. It was an incredibly hard decision. On the one hand we've always felt like we wanted to end up doing something in China someday. However, the opportunity that Eric was presented with wouldn't really make the most use of all of his skills or give him much room to grow. Plus, we were really happy about staying here in Orem. We *loved* the house that we'd put an offer on, and we'd already invested a good chunk of change in purchasing it. We have lots of family around here, and are much closer to the rest of them here than we would be in China. Now that we're done with school, and have a baby we're kind of ready to just settle down. Anyways, we were able to push our due diligence deadline back a week from Thursday, July 23 to Friday, July 31 while we tried to gather up all of the information about the different options we'd been given. By Wednesday, July 29th it was pretty evident that we weren't going to get all the answers we needed to make an informed decision, and we were obviously staring down the barrel of a pretty major decision with a hard and fast deadline.

High: Taylor agreed to watch Samuel while Eric and I went to the temple to get a chance to think things over and ask the Lord for guidance. We were running a little bit later than we would have liked, and we got to the temple just after a session had started. That was actually a blessing because it meant that we had longer to just sit in the chapel and read scriptures and ponder together. I got in there before Eric and was able to flip through the scriptures for a second. I opened up to the back where the pictures are (yes, I am 4 and am drawn to the pretty pictures). As I looked at those pictures of the church history sites - most of which I've been blessed to be able to go to - I had a feeling of how blessed I had been to have seen those places with my own eyes and be able to feel of their spirit. Then when Eric came in he opened the scriptures at random to Doctrine and Covenants 68. We read through it and even though most of the chapter is devoted to priesthood hierarchy and things that would generally be considered less inspiring (not unimportant, but not what I'd generally look at and be inspired by), there were a few phrases that jumped out to me. In particular verse 8 -
Go ye into all the world, preach the gospel to every creature, acting in the authority which I have given you, baptizing in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost.
Before going to the temple I was leaning towards that we should go to China, but since we didn't have an official job offer, and we didn't even know if it was going to come through ever... and we *really* liked the house, it was only a slight leaning and I can't say I really wanted it to be true. After reading that scripture I felt like my leaning was confirmed and that I couldn't fight it anymore, we were supposed to be going to China.

That endowment session was one of the best that I've ever been to. Somehow going with a purpose to receive an answer opened up the endowment for me. I can't explain what it is exactly that I got out of it more than usual (not just because there are things that shouldn't be talked about outside the temple, but because I can't explain what I saw that was different even if I did talk about it), but everything seemed to have deeper meaning and I came up with more questions than ever before. Also, since Eric and I were the first ones in the chapel we were asked to be the witness couple which is always a cool experience. I felt like the Lord was particularly aware of us and our being there when in a prayer given in that session the brother giving the prayer asked that anyone who had come to the temple that day with a special purpose would have their purpose granted. No one there knew what we were facing at that time and I knew that Heavenly Father had inspired that brother to give that prayer on our behalf. The spirit that I felt at that moment was so strong and unmistakable.

After the session was over Eric and I had a few moments to sit together in the Celestial Room and ponder together. After a few minutes of silent prayer we discussed our feelings. We had both come to the same conclusion, even though we didn't have an official job offer, or a place to live or many of the other things you'd want to have before making such a decision - we needed to be ready to go to China at any time. Which leads me to my low...

Low: Our lease on our condo ends next Monday and we don't have somewhere to live yet. We don't know how long we're going to be here and we don't have a particular job offer. We're in the ultimate limbo land. However...

High Part II: My Facebook status right now says that we are "living it up by faith." That's not how you'd usually see it phrased but I'll tell you why I phrased it that way. We're not merely living by faith, but thriving on that faith. Even though we're in this mega limbo land with nothing decided, I'm totally at peace. I hadn't even realized how much turmoil I was in before receiving this answer and getting to a point where I was totally at peace. Weird huh? You would think that receiving an answer to move to the opposite side of the planet, and not having anything prepared would be a state of turmoil, but I am at peace about the whole thing. It doesn't mean I'm not sad about not buying that house, or scared to death of moving to China, or frustrated that we don't have somewhere to live next week... but I'm perfectly at peace. The Lord truly does take care of us when we are willing to listen to His counsels. I am so grateful for His guidance and the power of prayers and temples.

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